Last one for now

I think this is probably the last of the old poetry I'll let see the light of day.  I may at some point in the future release a little of the prose, but honestly, I kind of doubt it.  I don't really remember writing this one.  Now I think it's fucking devastating.

birthday

cross your fingers and close

your eyes and wish real hard.

wish harder than you have

ever wished for anything

before.

wish so hard that your brow

furrows and your cheeks

redden.

wish so hard that your

temples throb, and

beads of sweat trickle

down your forehead.

wish so hard that you

actually shake

and your shoulders tremble

and your nails draw blood in your fists

and tears pool

at the corners of your eyes

and then slide down your cheeks.

wish to the point

you have to scream but

can't.

wish so hard that your head

becomes too hot to hold

in your own two hands.

wish so hard that you break up

the party

because you don't care where

you are or who's around you.

wish until you can taste

blood in your mouth

mixing with the spit

until its on your sleeve

until you can't breathe anymore.

yes,

wish with your last breath.

now,

don't tell anyone

what you wished for

and see if it comes true.